Short things learned by someone short

There are many lessons in life that can have whole blog posts written about them.

Here is a list of things which don't need entire articles:

1. Once you have a child, don't plan full schedules. Plan an item or two, then let your new child fill in the rest. 

2.  A shirt: a burp cloth you wear.

3.  Pants: the burp cloth you won't know you are wearing until you are somewhere nice.

4.  Sometimes you need to declare your love on social media.  Your wife secretly wants to brag about it.

5.  Remember to always spoil your wife. Someone will, why not you?

Beginning a life

It's beginning to look a lot like a family laden holiday full of pitfalls and possibilities. So many opportunities to shine or fail.

So let us make our list then!

First things first, determine your goals for the holiday. Is it important to meet all the family?  Maybe you both want a quiet holiday at home. Figure out what you want most of all and then schedule it. If your goal is family, make plans with each group. You may need multiple days and that is okay. Don't worry about how long it will take.

Next, gifts. You both need to agree on a budget for each other. Stick to the budget. Don't play games with it. You don't want to be on either side of something unbalanced. 

Now that you have a budget. Look for clues. If your significant other is a practical person, have they talked about something useless?  How about something that makes no sense?  These are clues. When all else fails, take a wild guess at something they might like, find something similar looking, then ask their opinion.  If they don't like it, go in a different direction. Keep trying. While a gift card is acceptable for many people, don't do that to your significant other unless they ask for one.

If you are really at a loss, here are some ideas:
Music
Jewelry
Movies
Jewelry
Automatic car starts
Jewlery

When in doubt, find something related to her hobby. 

This is also a good time to plan for their birthday and future holidays. See if they have a bucket - list that you can cross something off of. 

Finally, all the gifts are purchased, the decorating is done, now all that is left to do is wait for the right day.  So while you are waiting, make a tradition for your family. Go light hunting, bake cookies, watch old sci-fi movies. Pick something and make a memory of it. Then do it each year.

Some parting thoughts:
Your biggest gift (presentation-wise) should be to your significant other.

Once you start a family, they are your primary concern.

Don't let anyone tell you how to be a family.

Enjoy the holiday.

Oh! Hello, my noisy offspring!

Ahh sleep. The glorious periods where you succumb to unconciousness and relax.  Brilliant times of complete and total oblivion. These long times are what you will wish for as you start your journey. Your friends with kids were right.  Why didn't I get more sleep? 

Well, take heart, it doesn't work like that anyway.  Even if you slept for 20 hours prior to birth, chances are you will still be tired 12 to 16 hours later.  The bad part is not that you can't get enough hours, you certainly can between feedings, but that you only get about an hour each time. 

This is torture but you will get used to it. Here are a few things to remember that can help:
1.  It doesn't matter how long, just sleep. Even if you know you don't like short naps. You may not get much else.
2.  Your partner is just that.  A partner.  Not a minion.  Certainly not an enemy.
3.  Everyone is tired. Believe me, if your baby could stay asleep and not be hungry, they would. They don't hate you. They just only have enough stomach for a walnut. Just one.  How long can you go on one walnut?
4.  If baby can have a midnight snack, so can you. Just don't go overboard. (Also, don't have your snack be buttered popcorn.  Some smells are just too similar)
5.  Babies will let you know when they are hungry... except if they are sick, jaundiced, tired, lazy, bored, excited, scared, or hungry.  In these cases, they will cry an refuse to take food.  Trust me, they want the food, but the don't know what it is or that they need to stop screaming to get it. Keep trying. A bottle can help. Forcing a feeding schedule works best. Yes it means waking a sleeping baby every few hours, but believe me, if they go 4 or 5 hours without food, they will cry for ages and not take much food.  You will be up all night. 
6.  Mama is tired and sore.  Add to this the  possibilities of baby blues and depression that can happen now and we find her taking on too much. Even if it is just a couple hours in the evening, take baby and a bottle and let her take a nap. 
7.  Plan to take a weekend off after birth.  Don't go anywhere or do anything requiring getting decently dressed or meeting people you know.
8.  Let your wife be a baby too. Spend a day letting her rest and recover while you bring both mom and baby food.
9.  Go to bed early. I mean early. You won't get to sleep right away because it is new, but winding down will let you slip back and forth between sleep and awake easier.
10.  If your baby needs phototherapy, take them to a hospital and stay with them if possible. Children's hospitals are great about this, have the uv equipment, and go nuts about taking care of the parents as well as the baby. There may be home options, but they take longer and you also need to consider just how well you will sleep if you are worrying.  The nurses know what to watch for and can spot it long before you even know it is there. For your sanity, just go to the hospital.
11.  Your baby will eventually grow a larger stomach and sleep longer. Once that happens, you too will see sleep again.
12.  Hug your wife, tell her what a great job she is doing.