Health and happiness

So now that everything is running smoothly and you are the envy of every other couple out there, it is time to sit back, relax, and....

COUGH COUGH COUGH HACK....

Wait, no.  Not my beautiful world!  Illness!  Why?!

Okay, calm down.  Don't panic.  I will just man up and power through. My wife won't notice anything beyond my cough.

Okay, anyone who agreed with that needs to really consider how connected they are to their partner.  Of course they will notice. Every day there are hundreds of little things you do. When you are ill, some of these will change. You lose focus, you lose energy, motivation is right out the window.

Yes, you should work through the small stuff. Allergies and small colds, bumps, bruises, couches applied to spleens...

Big things will drag you down in ways you don't even notice. Tell your partner before they notice so that they don't start feeling like they are the cause. When you go from being talkative at night to being quiet and passive, they will notice. You are a part of their life and they shouldn't be in the dark.

If you find yourself on the opposite side of an odd silence, ask them about it. If they are feeling under the weather, it is time to be a supporter. Listen to what they need. This can be as easy as them telling you what they want. Other times it will be obvious signs of effort where there weren't any before. Don't let your partner suffer anything alone. They are a part of you now.  Act like it.

Short things learned by someone short

There are many lessons in life that can have whole blog posts written about them.

Here is a list of things which don't need entire articles:

1. Once you have a child, don't plan full schedules. Plan an item or two, then let your new child fill in the rest. 

2.  A shirt: a burp cloth you wear.

3.  Pants: the burp cloth you won't know you are wearing until you are somewhere nice.

4.  Sometimes you need to declare your love on social media.  Your wife secretly wants to brag about it.

5.  Remember to always spoil your wife. Someone will, why not you?

Beginning a life

It's beginning to look a lot like a family laden holiday full of pitfalls and possibilities. So many opportunities to shine or fail.

So let us make our list then!

First things first, determine your goals for the holiday. Is it important to meet all the family?  Maybe you both want a quiet holiday at home. Figure out what you want most of all and then schedule it. If your goal is family, make plans with each group. You may need multiple days and that is okay. Don't worry about how long it will take.

Next, gifts. You both need to agree on a budget for each other. Stick to the budget. Don't play games with it. You don't want to be on either side of something unbalanced. 

Now that you have a budget. Look for clues. If your significant other is a practical person, have they talked about something useless?  How about something that makes no sense?  These are clues. When all else fails, take a wild guess at something they might like, find something similar looking, then ask their opinion.  If they don't like it, go in a different direction. Keep trying. While a gift card is acceptable for many people, don't do that to your significant other unless they ask for one.

If you are really at a loss, here are some ideas:
Music
Jewelry
Movies
Jewelry
Automatic car starts
Jewlery

When in doubt, find something related to her hobby. 

This is also a good time to plan for their birthday and future holidays. See if they have a bucket - list that you can cross something off of. 

Finally, all the gifts are purchased, the decorating is done, now all that is left to do is wait for the right day.  So while you are waiting, make a tradition for your family. Go light hunting, bake cookies, watch old sci-fi movies. Pick something and make a memory of it. Then do it each year.

Some parting thoughts:
Your biggest gift (presentation-wise) should be to your significant other.

Once you start a family, they are your primary concern.

Don't let anyone tell you how to be a family.

Enjoy the holiday.