On being a gentleman

What is a Gentleman?

Some would have you believe a gentleman is a mythological creature.  A lost part of history that may or may not have ever existed.

Many tend to bring up the term "Chivalrous" as if it answered the entire question.  They especially like to throw this around as it pertains to women.  The code of chivalry I have read contains only one line about women:
To Respect the Honour (if we are going that far back, might as well spell it their way) of Women.

In reality, Chivalry is NOT dead; as so many people like to throw out. Rather, we seem to have forgotten a bit of it along the way.  In an age where Kings ruled and Knights were there for the protection of a realm, it became apparent to someone that the ruling class should have some rules themselves.  The primary idea of Chivalry was that the upper classes must act in a way befitting someone in such a position.  Thus, if one could afford a giant stone house and the people to clean it and guard it, one could afford to treat those unable to do so with a bit more compassion than they treat each other.  A king should always act in the best interest of those he ruled.  A knight, as an extension of this ruler, must also always act in the interest of those being ruled.  They must be honest, trustworthy, and not the kind of person to use another for personal gain.  No one ever starts out this way.  It is a decision to be made by each person.

As the ages of kings died out, the rules governing men of this level were continued on in Gentlemen.  Men of sufficient upbringing to take on the responsibilities of the Ruling class.

So how should a Modern Gentleman Act?

Well, largely the same, really.  The basic tenets of the old code are largely still applicable with only slight modifications.

- To protect the weak and defenseless - seems rather straightforward.
- To provide aid to widows and orphans - no argument there.
- To refrain from the wonton giving of offense -  Wait, trolling is bad?
- To live by honor and for glory - got it: shut up, mean what you say, do the right thing.
- To despise monetary reward - Look, we can disagree all over the place here, but bottom line, do it because it should be done, not because you might get money for it.
- To fight for the welfare of all - Maybe not with fists or swords, but support something.
- To obey those placed in authority - As a thinking person, I can mostly agree with this, If it is wrong, then fight to change it.
- To guard the honor of fellow knights - how about to guard the honor of everyone?
- To eschew unfairness and deceit - don't lie or cheat.
- To see something you started to the end - Okay, I am sure I am not alone in needing to work on this one.
- To respect the honor of women - (modern day; modern spelling) just do it.
- Never refuse a challenge from an equal - unless it is a stupid challenge that goes against any of the above.


One last thing:
If you are dating my daughter, I am the person in Authority, and no, you may not challenge it.  I am NOT your equal.